I hope everyone is safe and warm with the snowy, icy roads.

Today is February 14, affectionately known as Valentine’s Day. I remember being a kid in school drawing a card for a first-grade crush and making sure I had plenty of heart-shaped candies to share. Much has been written on whether Valentine’s Day should be celebrated by Jews, especially since cards, flowers, and chocolate do not seem overtly religious. But the holiday’s full name of St. Valentine’s Day implies that it has Christian roots.

There are several explanations of where the holiday came from. One of the most universally accepted is the legend of a holy priest and third-century romantic named Valentine, who continued to perform wedding ceremonies for young soldiers and their sweethearts even after the Roman emperor Claudius II forbid them. Valentine was imprisoned and sentenced for execution on February 14, whereupon he penned a farewell letter to his own sweetheart and signed it, “From your Valentine.” (That may explain the cards?)

Vatican II, the landmark set of reforms adopted by the Catholic Church in 1969, removed Valentine’s Day from the Catholic church’s calendar, asserting that “though the memorial of St. Valentine is ancient… apart from his name nothing is known…. Except that he was buried on the Via Flaminia on 14 February.”

In my last semester of college, I took a class with Rabbi Michael Broyde, a leading American legal and halakhic (Jewish law) scholar. The class was on American law and Jewish law – it was the first class he ever taught at the university level. Rabbi Broyde was brilliant and everything he shared went way over my head.

However, in one class, we got on the topic of whether Jewish law allows for celebration of non-Jewish holidays, including Valentine’s Day. Rabbi Broyde has written that the Rama (Rabbi Moshe Isserles, Poland, 1520-1572) had four criteria that must be met in order to permit Jewish celebration of rituals initiated by non-Jews:

1. Does the debated activity have a secular origin or value?
2. Can one rationally explain the behavior or ritual apart from the gentile holiday or event?
3. If there are idolatrous origins, have they disappeared?
4. Are the activities consistent with Jewish tradition?

Rabbi Broyde concluded that “the technical halacha (legal) permits Valentine’s Day observances as the day has completely lost its religious overtones and can be rationally explained as a celebration of love. Valentine’s Day is no longer celebrated even by Christians as a Christian holiday. It is a day of love, friendship, and candy, each of which is independently explainable.” He added that bringing home chocolate, flowers, or jewelry are all okay – but it is “the conduct of the pious to avoid explicitly celebrating Valentine’s Day with a Valentine’s Day card.” That saves some money!

Funny story – my parents would not spend money on cards for each other’s birthday, their anniversary, or even Valentine’s Day. Instead, they would go to a store that sold greeting cards and pull several cards off the rack and say, “Here, read these!” And then they gave each other a kiss.

Rabbi Jack Abramowitz, Torah Content Editor at the Orthodox Union, has a different view. He wrote, “Valentine’s Day is marked by several features, not the least of which is materialism and conspicuous consumption. For a day dedicated to love, there is a tremendous emphasis on candy, flowers, stuffed animals, greeting cards, and lingerie. Valentine’s Day is not for Jews. That’s for ancient Romans, Catholics, and greeting card companies.“

Our tradition does celebrate a holiday of love and romance – Tu b’Av (the 15^th of the Jewish month of Av – this year starting the evening of August 8). This “day of love” is mentioned in the Talmud as a celebration at the beginning of the grape harvest, in which all the unmarried girls in Jerusalem would dress in white and dance in the vineyards awaiting male suitors. Perhaps save your cards, candy hearts, and romantic dinners until then?

When a small leadership group from Portland went to Israel in December 2023, two months following the horrific Hamas attack, we met with Osnat Sharabi-Matalon, the sister of Eli Sharabi and Yossi Sharabi.

Last Saturday, Eli Sharabi (from Kibbutz Be'eri) was one of the three hostages released from Gaza, along with Or Levy and Ohad Ben Ami. Eli's wife, Lian, and his daughters, Noya and Yahel, were murdered on October 7, 2023. His brother, Yossi, was also kidnapped and died in Gaza (his body is still there).

We learned from news reports that Eli was aware of the fact his brother died in captivity. Sadly, however, he was not aware that his wife and daughters were murdered. When he met his sister, Osnat, and his mother at the Israeli crossing point, he asked them “Where are they?” as he expected to see his wife and daughters. It was at that moment, after 491 days in captivity and finally back in Israel, he learned for the first time his family was dead. I cannot imagine the heartbreak.

Today, there are 73 hostages in captivity, 34 of those are confirmed dead. After much "saber rattling" this week, tomorrow three hostages are scheduled to be released. The world is waiting for them ALL to be home.

Yizhar Hess, Vice Chairman of the World Zionist Organization (WZO) and formally the CEO of the Masorti movement in Israel, is speaking at the Mittleman Jewish Community Center on Sunday, February 23 at 1:00 p.m. I hope you will join us by registering here. Hess, an activist and commentator on issues of religion and state in Israel, religious pluralism, and Israel-Diaspora relations, will be in Portland participating in the NAASE (North American Association of Synagogue Executives) conference February 23-26.

Read more about the upcoming WZO elections (starting March 10) and the voice it provides Jews around the world over Israel’s governance. it is the single biggest opportunity for North American Jews to influence the future of the Jewish people.

Finally, the 20^th anniversary Gus and Libby Solomon Memorial Lecture will take place on February 27. Rachel Kranson of the University of Pittsburgh will speak on, "Religious Misconceptions: American Jews and the Politics of Abortion." She will share the history of the American Jewish lawyers and activists who advocated for abortion access to be protected by the guarantees of the first amendment of the constitution. Their efforts have become even more significant as the US enters a post-Roe era, and experts are looking for new legal avenues through which to protect reproductive freedom. Learn more and register here.

Shabbat shalom and let the thawing begin.